Real Men Wear Skinny Jeans

No, seriously. I think all guys should own at least one pair of skinny jeans, the same way every woman should own at least one pair of black, strappy three-inch stilettos. In neither case must they be worn every day (though hopefully the skinnies would be worn more than the strappies), but it's just good to own.

Granted, I'm a bit of a free spirit when it comes to fashion, but really. 

Girls? What do you think of this pic? Guys, what do you think of this?

Bird or Rat?

Okay, so technically his name is Byrd, not Bird. But still. They're pronounced the same, aren't they? Yes. Moving on.

My Career Management teacher is Mr. Byrd. We all call him Byrd behind his back, but if you address him as such (with no 'Mr.' in front), he gets severely pissed. I don't know why, so don't ask me. None of the other teachers have a problem with it: Mr. Phillip is Phil (or Philly, depending on your level of daring). Mr. Nauert is Nauert. Coach Wilson is Wilson.

Whenever he says something about his day (at the beginning of class, and he goes on for about fifteen minutes), he finishes with, "And that's my story, and I'm sticking to it." He always screws up the directions grammatically.

Segment: ... ,(IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS), ...

What, are we creating abstract art with our instructions now, Byrd? Blegh.

He thinks he's hilarious, and I guess he assumes we think so, too. He always laughs at his own jokes (yeah, not cool), and when he laughs, his eyes (covered by glasses that already make them look small and beady) scrunch up and become even smaller, and his mouth distorts into some odd shape that makes his teeth look narrower and pointier.

When he laughs, he looks like a rat.

Byrd is a rat. That is the point of this post.

Updated Firefox

I updated Mozilla Firefox on my school's computer to... I think it's 3.6, but I may be wrong. Anyways, it's the latest version for Windows (the version listed on the front page when you're on a Windows computer).

And they can't even get mad at me, can they? It's not like I went off and downloaded TOR (Google it). Which I totally would... if I wanted to get suspended. Moving on...

They have this new thing for Firefox called "personas," and I set the one on this computer to be red, white, and blue stars (our colors are blue and white, and I think we have red, too).

This Has Gone Too Far.

Read the title. What do I speak of that is so blasphemous, you ask?

Misspellings. Now, for the record, I don't mean weird words like "Mongolian" and "virtuous." I mean perfectly normal words. Words everyone uses every day. Like "definitely" and "like." Or, as they're apparently spelled now, "defiantly" and "liek."

This has gone way. Too. Fucking. Far. These misspellings disgust me, and I want it to end. I say we start a revolution! A revolution to change the world into a place where proper spelling and grammar makes you a royal, not a geek or nerd- or the forsaken dork. (You know what a dork technically is? A whale's penis. Now you know.)

A revolution! Who's with me?

Nobody?

Ugh.

"I Hate Twilight."

Wow, guys. That is just... amazing!

It might say something about the type of people that are attracted to my writing (or at least my polls, hehe), but most of y'all said you hate Twilight on that poll.

Don't worry if you want to put in your two cents' worth- the poll is still open for voting until 11:59 PM (Central Time), January 31st, 2010.

Knock yourself out!

101 Days of Vegetarianism

Just did a counter on my phone to see how long I've been vegetarian; it's been a-hundred-and-one days. Woah! That's over a hundred days! Well, barely, but still!

This is huge for me. I don't think I've ever stuck to anything this long besides ballet (when I was little) and doing my homework (forever). I am so proud of myself. Someone tell Onision!

Also: don't ask me if I eat eggs and drink milk. I do. It doesn't kill them. I am not going vegan anytime soon. Or ever.

Well, I gotta go. I'm gonna eat my bean burrito. Have fun, carnivores ;)

Omegle Chat (2:55 AM)

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: hi

You: damn that bitch was a whore

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Omegle Chat (2:53 AM)

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: im looking for a man to bend me over and treat me like a little slut

You: damn that bitch was a whore

You: wow.

Omegle Chat (2:52 AM)

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

Stranger: hi

You: damn that bitch was a whore

Stranger: i completely agree

You: i know!

You: such a bitch...

Stranger: did she fuck someone else?

Stranger: did the bitch fucking cheat on you?

You: no, it was the last person i talked to on omegle. fucking told me stop cussing.

Stranger: wow, what a cunt

You: i know! i mean, fuckin hell?

Stranger: exactly

Stranger: later homo

The Government Will Catch You Eventually, You Dumbass Terrorist

To slip through the only check against the no-fly list, the terrorist uses a stolen credit card to buy a ticket under a fake name. “Then you print a fake boarding pass with your real name on it and go to the airport. You give your real ID, and the fake boarding pass with your real name on it, to security. They’re checking the documents against each other. They’re not checking your name against the no-fly list—that was done on the airline’s computers. Once you’re through security, you rip up the fake boarding pass, and use the real boarding pass that has the name from the stolen credit card. Then you board the plane, because they’re not checking your name against your ID at boarding.”

What if you don’t know how to steal a credit card?

“Then you’re a stupid terrorist and the government will catch you,” he said.

What if you don’t know how to download a PDF of an actual boarding pass and alter it on a home computer?

“Then you’re a stupid terrorist and the government will catch you.”

Sequels

A bunch of sequels are coming out later this year, and I'm excited. My top three I have to see?

Alvin and the Chipmunks: the Squeak-uel (however it's spelled); Shrek Ever After (AKA Shrek 4); and Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1 (or Part A, whichever).

I'll probably torrent them before I go to the theatre to see if they're any good. :)

School Internet

Since I live in Nashville (Davidson county) and Harpeth is in Kingston Springs (Cheatham county), I'm actually not supposed to come here. Nobody really cares, though. I keep their test scores high, and if I can work it out so I go here instead of Hillwood (shudder) then boom ka boom, I get to stay.

In order to work it out so I can stay, I'm getting a ride with my friend Tyler's mom (my second period math teacher), Mrs. A. This would work out totally normal, except that Tyler is doing football conditioning or whatever- yeah, I'm not a sports person- and has to stay after school until about four o'clock.

So, to entertain myself, I brought my laptop today and hung out in the library (free wifi and all the books I can read, since Ms. Wuller loves me) for a while. I looked around for information on the publishing industry and talked to a few people online that said since I'm so young, I'll have a hard time getting published. "Why?" I asked. 

"Because young people aren't good writers," was the common response.

Ugh.

I literally groaned out loud the sixth time I got this reply, and Coach Kelso (he does the track team, and was doing some sort of massage thing for the teachers- not sure why he was in the library) goes, "You making much progress?"

"Not really," I say, frowning as I unplug the computer. 

"Uh-oh!" he says. I wind up the power cord. "You doing a research paper?"

"It's more of something for my own interest," I say, and close the laptop.

"What is it?" probes Kelso.

"I'm trying to find a way to publish the book I'm working on, even though I'm thirteen."

He raises his eyebrows, and whether he's genuinely impressed or humoring me, I do not know. "You should talk to some publishers."

No shit, I think, but manage to hold this sentiment back. "Yeah, I think I'm going to Google some in the Nashville area." I realize how often I say that phrase and wonder if it sounds weird. Anyone else in the Nash- erm, living around Nashville- say it often?

"Good plan. I mean, they're probably gonna be really impressed. People like you don't come around every day."

I smile and nod. He's right. Can we say 'confidence boost'? If- when- I get this damn thing published, I'm going to put him in that thank-you section I'm planning. You know, the bit where you thank every person that helped you, and a few that didn't, really?

But I won't overload it.

Anyways, I just glanced at the title of this blog and realized how off-base I just got. Here's the original HOLY SHIT IT IS RAINING REALLY, REALLY HARD 

Moving on. 

Original point: my home page in Safari is blocked. (It's the Pirate Bay. I guess Harpeth isn't a huge fan of torrenting? Psshh, that's their problem, not mine.)

Career Management Success/Business Management Essay

Okay, before I even start with the essay, let me just say: it should not be legal for a class title to be that long. That phrase is six words long, which, in my opinion, is at least three too many. 

The teacher (Mr. Byrd) must have a thing for long titles, because the essay assignment sheet he gave us the second day was titled, 'Essay Title: "Where I hope to be and what I hope to be doing ten years from now"'

First of all, dumbass, that should all be capitalized. Second of all, remove the phrase 'Essay Title.' It is redundant, seeing as it is at the top of the page. Third, shorten it up, or your students will hate you even more than they already do, and they won't even pretend to laugh at your dumb jokes. Even Roupal, or however you spell her name.

I'm glad I decided to type the thing. We were given a minimum amount of 200 words, and mine ended up being exactly 856 words (not including the huge-ass header I had to put on there). Ugh... he better accept it. He accepted Buma's (Buma is the guy's last name, we all call him that) paper at 166 words, so if mine isn't acceptable, I will demand to be transferred out.

I didn't want to be in that class! I wanted concert band, dammit! Oy, vei. (Or however you spell it.)

The Truth

I believe the truth always lies halfway between the two most extreme claims. Sometimes, though, others have different opinions. Cartoon courtesy of XKCD. No, I can't promise this will be the last time I quote his hilarity.

No Team Mike?

What? Surely, there's a few Mike fans. No? All right, then...

If you have no idea what I'm talking about, then you need to get the eff over to the right side and take the monthly poll. Why? It's important!

And I would have at least thought there'd be some freaking Emmett fans. Eric I can understand, but no Emmett fans?! You people disappoint me.

Torrenting

Just got a whole new batch of music from ThePirateBay.com, including works by:

-Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
-Stonecircle
-In Vain
and
-Toby Keith

A bit of a weird selection, but I saw each of them and thought, "Why the hell not?" I hadn't heard of Stonecircle or In Vain before, but they're both pretty good.

Favorite RJA song is "Godspeed." I didn't think it could get much better than "Damn Regret," and "Face Down," but somehow they managed.

In other music news, I absolutely adore the song "Blah Blah Blah" by Ke$ha (ft. 3OH!3). Think you haven't heard of her? Think again. You know that song they're always playing, the one that goes, "'Fore I leave, brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack, 'cause when I leave for the night, I ain't comin' back,"? She sings that. Ah, now you know who she is.

Yep. Look that up. It's amazing.

Polyvore 'Brand' Filter Working Again

It's all cool again; Polyvore's brand filter is officially working.

I have absolutely no idea what was wrong- maybe it was maintenance? Humph.

Listening to 'Dental Care' by Owl City. It's probably one of the cutest, most amusing songs I have ever had the fortune to hear. And he's right about dentists... damn sadists.

Poll!

AAAHHH! How could I forget to mention that there's a new poll?

Well, there's a new poll. It's up until the end of this month. That means it's limited edition or some such thing. Which makes it important. (?)

Anyways, you should vote (if only because I included the Cedric option, and I like to see Twilight get a nice ass-whoopin').

Sudo vote. (All you hardcore XKCD fans should get a kick out of that one.)

Retarded 3rd Grade Question

Are you smarter than a 3rd grader? My 3rd grade sister apparently isn't.

Question from "Brain Quest: Math Basics (3rd Grade)" (bolding added by me) was this: "Mr. and Mrs. Lee are the parents of 3 sons. Each son has 1 sister. How many children in all?"

She thought it was six, which makes total sense. One girl to each boy: three boys, three girls, six children total. Apparently, though, it's four. Why? Because that book is irritating.

The answer: "Four. The brothers all have the same sister."

THE FUCK? I believe a nice XKCD comic is necessary here.

Polvyore 'Brand' Filter Not Working?

Is anyone else having the same problem I am? The 'brand' filter in Polyvore (a free online outfit builder- tons of fun, a link is in the title of this post) isn't working! It has that gray "you-can't-use-this" overlay. 


Just curious; am I the only one this is happening to? Can't find anything about it elsewhere on the interwebs.


Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go make some lunch. For my belly.

Why Not?

I recently got tagged by the wonderful Jules in this post by Jules and Val. I have to list five random facts about myself. Why not?

1) I skipped a grade. I did the first semester of kindergarten, then the last semester of first grade.
2) I have a hatred for alcohol. Not sure why. But it is gross, and smells terrible, and I don't like it.
3) Nonetheless, I crack up when I see drunk people. Not hobo-drunk, just crazy-drunk.
4) I've been to Canada, Mexico, Panama, Belize, Honduras, Jamaica, and the Cayman Islands.
5) Right now, I'm in an airport where indoor smoking isn't allowed. W00T!! :D

Okay, that's enough.

Now I tag: nobody. End of the line here. Meh.

The Poll is Closed

Okay, this is going to be a really self-centered post, but I'm trying to figure out some crap. Here are a few questions.

Of my readers that took the poll, 41% of you use Twitter. Do any of you follow me (@thatprettichick)?

25% of you said you use social networking sites other than the ones I had listed. What others do you use? Just curious! :)

Replies would be greatly appreciated, just comment to tell me.