About the Author
Friday, April 30, 2010
1. You get to choose your lunch period if enough people are absent :D There are only two lunch periods today, and since the teacher gets to choose which one you go to (meh), there's at least a 50/50 chance you'll get to sit with people you normally wouldn't be able to.
2. Most people are absent. Including the ones you don't like. Heh.
3. You get to hang out in the A+ lab when your second period teacher, the one in charge of prom, leaves early. Woo! And then you can blog!
4. You get to take balloons out to aforementioned second period teacher's car rather than do your freaking Algebra II homework. The only downfall is that there's always a chance you'll practically fall on a curb and end up pulling a muscle in your hip, of all places.
And those are four benefits to prom day I can really appreciate, even though I'm not going.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
I'm aware that they are influencing the economy. I'm aware that they are a large generation. But honestly, why are we obsessed with the elderly? I'm not saying they don't matter, but studies have proven that happiness actually increases throughout the sixties and into the eighties and beyond. They don't need for us to wait on them, hand and foot.
There are 75.8 million boomers (born from 1946-1964). Some of them probably haven't made it this far, so we'll round down to 67 million. The total US population is approximately 309,119,859. This means that boomers constitute a grand total of 21% of the population. My approximation of the number of adolescents (aged 10-18) is 38 million*. That means that the number of citizens born in an eighteen-year time period have only 1.99 times as many people (75.8/38) as those born in a short eight-year period, when really this number should be closer to 2.25 (18/8).
All this math should prove to you a few things: a) I have way too much time on my hands, b) Baby Boomers are not that big of a deal, and we need to focus on those who have a higher number of people compared to the amount of time we gave them to be born, and c) I forgot what this was supposed to be, but if I only have two things to say, I'll look like a moron.
*I couldn't find any direct information on this (thanks, US Census!), but in 1993, there were approximately 31 million adolescents in the US. I plugged this number into a proportion comparing the US populations in 1990 and 2010.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
1. What is your name spelled backwards? kcalB simetrA
2. Where were your parents born? Mom was born in Frankfurt, Germany. Dad was born somewhere in Estonia, I do believe.
3. What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer? "True Stories I Made Up" (a comedy album by Daniel Tosh)
4. What's your favorite restaurant? O'Charley's or Applebee's.
5. Last time you swam in a pool? Yesterday.
6. Have you ever been in a school play? Fo sho.
7. How many kids do you want? None.
8. Type of music you dislike most? Opera. I like pretty much everything else.
9. Are you registered to vote? Nope.
10. Do you have cable? My parents do.
11. Have you ever ridden on a moped? Don't think so.
12. Ever prank call anybody? Well, duh!
13. Ever get a parking ticket? I don't drive, so no.
14. Would you go bungee jumping or sky diving? I would do once- just to be able to honestly say I've done it.
15. Furthest place you ever traveled? Jamaica and the Caiman Islands.
16. Do you have a garden? HA! Me? With plants? Riight.
17. What's your favorite comic strip? xkcd
18. Do you really know all the words to your national anthem? Yes.
19. Bath or Shower, morning or night? Shower at night- I sleep with my hair in a towel and by morning it's mostly dry, falling in tendrils.
20. Best movie you've seen in the past month? How to Train Your Dragon.
21. Favorite pizza topping? Black olives.
22. Chips or popcorn? Chips. Plain potato chips.
23. What color lipstick do you usually wear? Peachy-pink or candy-pink.
24. Have you ever smoked peanut shells? Um, no.
25. Have you ever been in a beauty pageant? ZOMGLOL. No.
26. Orange or Apple juice? Orange with no pulp. If there is pulp, then I will take apple.
27. Who was the last person you went out to dinner with and where did you dine? My maternal grandmother and I went to Cancun.
28. Favorite type chocolate bar? That stuff from Trader Joe's. The extra-dark with like 72% more something-or-other.
29. When was the last time you voted at the polls? I have yet to.
30. Last time you ate a homegrown tomato? The summer before my parents got divorced. When we grew tomatoes.
31. Have you ever won a trophy? Not that I can remember, but there's always the possibility.
32. Are you a good cook? Average, I think.
33. Do you know how to pump your own gas? Yeah, even though I don't drive yet. I got my grandmother to show me how.
34. Ever order an article from an infomercial? No.
35. Sprite or 7-up? Sprite- I do have a small amount of sanity, you know.
36. Have you ever had to wear a uniform to work? Never had a real job, but if I get hired at Publix like I want, then I'll have to.
37. Last thing you bought at a pharmacy? Tampons, probably.
38. Ever throw up in public? In a public restroom.
39. Would you prefer being a millionaire or find true love? Honestly? Being a millionaire. I know, that may make me seem like a heartless bitch, but whatever.
40. Do you believe in love at first sight? Yep.
41. Ever call a 1-900 number? Uh... I don't believe so.
42. Can exes be friends? On occasion.
43. Who was the last person you visited in a hospital? Hmm. I dunno, actually.
44. Did you have a lot of hair when you were a baby? I don't remember (obviously), but according to my mother, I had "an average baby amount of hair." I don't even know what that means.
45. What message is on your answering machine? It's a recording from peta2 (Silverstein): "Hey! Silverstein here! The person you're trying to reach isn't here right now, so leave a message- and while you're waiting, go to peta2.com!"
46. What's your all time favorite Saturday Night Live Character? Bon Qui Qui (she was SNL, right?) or that "Can I have yo numba?" guy (was he SNL?).
47. What was the name of your first pet? Yoda. It was my first stepdad's cat. He was fat and mean (the cat, not the stepdad).
48. What is in your purse? A crumpled dollar bill, some coins, cell phone, iPod, camera, few sheets of paper, broken ink pen, working pen, unsharpened pencil, sharpened pencil, graphing calculator.
49. Favorite thing to do before bedtime? Shower, then text.
50. What is one thing you are grateful for today? I'm grateful that I don't have a birth defect (walked a marathon for retarded kids today with Todd).
Monday, April 12, 2010
It's helped. It really has. I still have to take a breath before I go on, and at first I'm a little tense, but I don't feel like I'm going to throw up like some of my classmates have said they do. I just get anxious.
It's like I need encouragement or something. I dunno. I never think I'm doing something right, regardless of whether I am, in reality, doing it correctly or not. It's a thing I have. Like counting stuff. (I count stuff: letters in words, steps on a staircase, etc.) It's me. It's a quirk of mine, I suppose.
Or a mental disorder.
Sunday, April 4, 2010
What is your mother's maiden name? Ha! Just go to my profile, find the section where it displays my parents, and there you go.
What is your favorite movie? You know where you put in all your favorite movies in your profile? Remember how last time you watched Titanic you wouldn't shut up about how much you love that movie?
What is your favorite sport? If it's your favorite sport, you probably play. If you play, you probably mention it at some point or another.
What is your favorite food to eat? (A.D.D. Moment: What else would my favorite food be for?) Again, I've probably mentioned my favorite food a thousand times. Every time I eat it, I'm all, "OMG!"
What is the name of your pet? Are you for serious? All you have to do is troll my profile for "I'm feeding the damn cat again. God, I hate you, Bootsy." I mean, Jeebus, you don't even have to be my Facebook friend- just read through my blog archive!
What is your favorite holiday? This is a crappy question. There aren't all that many holidays- it's a matter of trial and error. Again, you don't even have to be my Facebook friend. Just guess.
In what city were you born in? (Another A.D.D. Moment: You don't have to say "in" twice, stupid.) This is a lot like the "mother's maiden name" question. Skip to my birthplace on my Facebook profile and type in the city.
USPS's only saving grace (and also its curse) is that you have to have your username in order to reset your password. I'm sure we've all forgotten our username at some point or other, and it's right frustrating to be told you can't even get an email reminder for it. Also, if you reset your password, all stored credit card information will be deleted. Just in case you decided you wanted to use my credit card to buy a huge P.O. box for 12 months for $600.
If you have my username, you probably have my email address. It's easy enough to figure out the answers to those questions as well- all Facebook-able within an hour or so.
In other words, I really hope none of my Facebook friends have any interest in my USPS account, because if they do, I'm completely screwed.