There's This Guy

Okay, so there's this guy. Boos from audience. A random crowd member screams, "Give us some real news!" Oh, shut up, George. Anyways, the guy. Yeah. Oh, all right, I'll tell you about him, if you insist.

One time he asked, "Why are we the same person with different genders? And operating systems?" It stuck with me (obviously). Absolutely cracks me up. Because we really are eerily similar. I don't really know if they're deep similarities or superficial ones; I can never tell the difference (you know me, I can hack the shit out of your computer and dress to kill, but I can't- yet- understand the human mind). But we are similar on certain levels.

He gets my sense of humor. I don't have to explain the joke or defend myself after saying something snarky. Wanna know why? He's the same way. When I say something without thinking, he doesn't make me feel like I really should've thought that one all the way through, darling. No, he just lols or luls or whatever it is he's doing that day. And I appreciate that.

He makes me feel just right, intellectually speaking. I don't feel like a genius talking to him, but I don't feel like a moron, either. That's very important to me- I don't want to feel like an idiot when I'm talking to someone, but I don't want to have to explain every other word or thought process. And with him, it's neither of those. It's like for one of the first times ever- and I don't mean to sound like a bitch here or to be snippy towards anyone else- I'm talking to someone I think I can relate to. He's about my age and on a similar intellectual level, from what I can tell. That hasn't ever really happened before. It's quite fun.

He has plans for when the zombies come. Really? That's just fucking awesome. There is nothing as absolutely hawt as someone who could survive the motherfucking zombie apocalypse. 'Nuff said on that.

He doesn't seem to mind when I swear. At least, I don't think he does. Unless him telling me that his parents snoop on his computer so to keep it clean was a lie and he just doesn't like it when I swear. Hmm. Now I'm paranoid. (I watched the Matrix for the first time tonight- can you tell?)

He seems to genuinely want to talk to me. And that, my friend, is probably the most important thing of all. 'Cause I want to talk to him, too.

My Zombie Apocalypse Bug Out Bag

I was surfing through the Zombie Survival Wiki and came across this brilliant little euphemism: the Bug Out Bag (link in title of post). I call it a euphemism because I think a far more appropriate name would be the "Holy Shit! Zombies! IMMA GET OUTTA HURR! Bag." But I digress.

Range Weapons: Slingshot (for rocks), JT's gun/ammo,

Melee Weapons: Hammer,
Food & Water: Bottle of Gatorade, bottle of Coke, two bottles of water, vitamins, jar of peanut butter, English muffins,
Lighting: Flashlight, candles, keychain with LED light,
Information: Two notebooks, pens, pencils,
Communication: Walkie-talkies and spare batteries, cell phone and charger,
Survival: Whistle (rape or survival, doesn't matter), mini-mirror,
Clothing: Spare jeans, jacket (worn, not carried, if possible), socks, spare tennis shoes
Camp Kitchen: Fork, spoon, bowl, empty can,
Fire Starting: Lighter, matches, second notebook
Entertainment: Playing cards, Apples to Apples To Go,
Hunting/Fishing: Heh. Crap. Whoops. Next.
Optics: Glasses, spare glasses, prescription sunglasses in the case,

Personal Hygiene: Toothbrush, toothpaste, chapstick, small bottle of hand sanitizer,
Shelter: Fuzzy red blanket, small pillow,
Maintenance/Tools: Glasses cleaner and cloth,
Repair Kit/Supplies: Duct tape, scissors, super glue, pocketknife with the little mini-tool things, two screwdrivers (different heads)
First Aid Kit: Band-aids, hydrogen peroxide, gauze, Tylenol,

Carrier or Bag: Purple hiking backpack thing,
Other/Special: Pepper spray,